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Claire is on a mission. Well a number of missions. She has a plan, you see - or an idea that might be a plab, so she can maybe be more than one half of 'the pair of blonde baking girls.'

First she tries that new hospital, looking for grouchy old men with canes. Then she tries the kitchen of the farmhouse, looking for the ghost of her boyfriend's sister. Then she wanders around the farm randomly looking for that redhead in a wheelchair and/or that older guy who makes her blood run cold everytime she sees his face.

It's possible anyone could find her anywhere, of course.

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Claire hovers by the door to the room, and clears her throat, just once.

zzzzsnrfl

"What do you want?"

It's his standard greeting to people who enter his hospital! He's also tipping his head forward so the book falls into his lap and he can, y'know, actually look at her.

Ha, awkward.

Claire shrugs.

"Just to ask - I know you haven't got any patients or anything, but do you need a hand, in here? In case you do?"

House is a minor deity of awkward!

"A hand with what? You're too young to be a nurse."

And while a nurse's job can probably be performed by a moron, it does have to be a moron with medical training.

"And for your information I do too have a patient. Guy showed up with a busted leg and some ribs cracked. Stuck a cast on the leg, handed over some codeine and crutches, and told him to get lost."

Claire shrugs.

"Not too young to start training, though right? And I could clean and stuff."

She'd bet dollars to doughnuts he's not cleaning after himself.

"I just- need something to do. And I think I could help."

"Sure."

Someday he's going to figure out why women are flinging themselves at him asking to clean up his hospital. Until then, he'll just enjoy the benefits.

"You'll fit right in with Windows 95, my other tiny female assistant."

"Windows 95?" Claire eyes him.

"You haven't upgraded to Vista yet?"

Teen sarcasm, don't you just love it?

"I think if I suggested it she might cry. Wouldn't want that."

Smirk.

"No, seriously, there's a short Japanese girl named Windows 95 who practically begged to be my secretary."

Claire's eyebrows furrow. 'Secretary' huh? To this old man.

Riiight.

"Well, I was hoping I could get something in exchange."

"Something such as...? If you want money, I hate to break it to you but it's not gonna be all that much use."

"No."

Eyeroll!

"You're a doctor, so you've got all the medical school stuff. I want to know more about how my body works."

OH GOD PLEASE DON'T LET HIM TAKE THAT IN A DIRTY WAY.

...

It starts as a snort, and has grown into a full-blown snicker by the time he reins himself in and at least makes a halfhearted attempt to be serious.

"Right. Sure, you can raid my library all you like. Figuratively speaking."

Figuratively speaking because the 'library' of this hospital is a collection of books scattered across nearly every room in a dirty floor.

Totally not because he's still snickering.

Right.

Claire's glaring while trying to keep her tone civil. It's not hard.

"I meant mine specifically," she says, setting her jaw against further innuendo. "I've looked in thousands of books and none of them ever cover - what I can do."

"Great. You have superpowers. Go talk to someone who also has superpowers. I'm a doctor, not a comic book."

That annoys Claire considerably more than his innuendo.

"You're kidding? You're not even curious?"

"I'm curious about everything. Except for boring things. Little girls with superpowers are boring."

...

It makes sense in his head?

"Fine."

Claire glares again, and shrugs.

"God, I thought you'd want to know how it worked. I guess I'll go find a doctor who actually cares about helping people."

"Caring about helping people is bullshit. I care about curing illnesses. Do you have an illness? No? Then either tell me what your superpower is, or go away."

"I heal," Claire says. "Everything. The last time I was in a hospital? I was getting up from an autopsy table."

"Okay, now if you'd led with that we wouldn't have needed to argue about how interesting you are for two minutes. Any relation to Creepy Monochromatic Guy, or are you a special kind of magic healing person?"

...just because he finds her intriguing now doesn't mean he'll mock her any less.

"Well, I didn't get it through murder and eating people's brains," Claire points out.

She's not in a good mood.

"I don't know what I can do or how it works. That's what I want to find out."

"Under ordinary circumstances I'd be tempted to say all he'd get from eating people's brains is an increased potential for prion disease, but around here..."

Shrug.

"All right, so what do you want me to do? Diagnose your... healthiness?"

--you know, that actually sounds pretty cool.

Shrug yourself!

"If that's what you wanna do. You're the doctor. Can you think of any tests you'd want to do?"

"I can think of lots. Most of which I don't have the equipment for, some of which make me glad there's no Board of Ethics on this farm."

It's partly a joke and partly its own kind of test. Is she serious enough about figuring out her power to take a chance on the truth value of his off-colour humour?

Claire gives a very dry smile.

"I think your Board of Ethics is basically the fact that if I don't like what you do, I know about five people who could do some serious bodily harm."

If putting up with him is what she needs to find out about herself? Sure.