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"......what did you do, Black, you miscreant?"

"Nothing, Evans! What makes you think it's my fault? Bloody harridan!"

"Well, let's see. I was in the same room as you, and then there was a bright light and a loud bang, and now I'm.....Merlin knows where."

(Queens. Or what's left of it.)

"Well, I sure didn't have anything to do with it! Bloody....Evans, there are only three people I'm comfortable being alone with, and none of them are you, so lay off, all right?"

Sirius Black and Lily Evans, both aged 16, have just been Shattered. Somebody may want to come find them before they kill each other. Please.

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Here! Have a very tall, broad-shouldered man in stylised (it looks like it's vaguely based off a bird) bronze and red armour. His face can't be seen - The helmet/mask covers it. He also has a crossbow tapping against his shoulder.

His companion isn't much better - Shorter, but also armoured, black and red and awfully spikey, with her face similarly concealed.

They're maybe not the most comforting welcoming party ever.

At least Morrigan doesn't have her swords out.

When she sees the pair of teens she looks up at them sharply and then glances back to Tomas.

"New people," she says, jerking her head. "Over there."

New people, indeed.

Young. 16, it happens, in both cases.

One is a girl, red hair and bright green eyes, wearing a black robe over a short black skirt and white blouse, with a red-and-gold tie. The other is a boy with dark hair and gray eyes, wearing the same uniform, only with slacks instead of a skirt. He's holding a broom in one hand, gesticulating with it as he and the redhead bicker.

They're really quite loud.

Tomas doesn't seem to care, though he does alter his route a little to take them over to them.

He's relying on Ensorra to do the talking.

"Joy of joys."

She puts on the speed and jogs over, blurring slightly in the process.

"You! Quit shouting, it attracts the carnivorous plants!"

Sirius and Lily turn to her in unison.

"Carnivorous plants?"

Yeah, that was in unison too.

Watch them glare at each other.

Tomas just nods, gravely.

"Carnivorous plants. They track on loud noises. Hi. Welcome to New York. I'm... Sara. This is Tomas. He doesn't talk much."

She almost introduces herself as Morrigan, but that would just get confusing once she's out of her armour.

Lily and Sirius exchange looks, animosity temporarily gone, and draw their wands.

"Lily Evans," the redhead says. "This is Sirius Black. Where are we? How did we get here?"

Tomas turns to peer at Sirius, then at Ensorra.

It's a silent question - Whether she thinks it's safe to de-armourifyicatize, as is the proper term (not one the mun just made up.)

Sigh.

"You can take off your armour. That way you'll actually be able to speak. I'll keep watch in case we get any man-eating plants barreling around the corner."

And in case Lily or Sirius suddenly decides to turn into a Machina and attack them, but y'know. That's less likely.

"Lumos!"

Yeah, that was in unison, again. The two wands are now glowing; Lily and Sirius are looking around, clearly expecting to be eaten at any moment.

"Are they vulnerable to anything? Fire, freezing cold....anything?"

Ensorra gets a very grave thumbs up before Tomas removes the high-tech belt that generates his armour, letting it dissolve around him.

"Fire is a safe bet."

"Yeah, fire. I've discovered they're not too fond of lightning either, but fire works."

Sirius and Lily exchange looks, then sidle up to each other and have a whispered conference.

The short version goes like this:

Sirius: Muggles. Statute of Secrecy.
Lily: Carnivorous plants. Extenuating circumstances.
Sirius: Want to get expelled and arrested?
Lily: If it means the Ministry has to come and GET US?
Sirius: .......point taken.

That conversation over, Lily looks up at Tomas and Sara. "We can do fire."

"Oh, good. Everyone loves fire."

"Uh-huh. If that's settled, Tomas, should we bring 'em back to base?"

"Hang on."

Sirius grabs Lily's elbow, holding her back as she tries to walk toward them. "You didn't answer....where are we? And how'd we get here?"

Pause.

"And while I'm at it, what are your surnames?"

That whole 'bring them to base' thing makes him nervous.

"...Jensen. Sara Jensen. You're in New York. Nobody knows how we got here. There's four of us taking shelter in an abandoned subway station a couple blocks thataway." Appropriate pointing. "The ones you haven't met are Jessica and... uh, the girl with the fingers, she hasn't given a name."

Tomas can give up his own last name if he feels like it. As for Sor', she's hoping the alternate universes thing will mean these kids don't know her from a hole in the ground. Being famous gets annoying when you also happen to have a secret identity, but really, it's not fair to keep concealing herself now that the world's gone and ended.

"Oh," Sirius says, and considers that.

Well. 'Jensen' is hardly a wizarding surname, at least. Not one that Sirius recognizes, anyway, and he knows most of them.

Also, they're not dressed very wizarding. And that armor...

Maybe they're robots. Sirius has read about robots, in the sigh-fy magazines Peter likes. Robots can look JUST LIKE PEOPLE, until they burn you alive with their laser eyebeams!

He suggests this, quietly, to Lily.

She gives him a very odd look and tells him that's crazy, also very quietly.

Sirius points out that it hardly seems any crazier than going from Scotland to New York in an eyeblink, without Apparating, and finding themselves in the company of Sara, Tomas, Jessica, and somebody who may or may not be made up entirely of fingers.

Lily glowers, because she doesn't want to admit he has a point.

"Tomas Black." Tomas says, quickly, once they're done muttering to each other.

"So!" Cheerfully. "Back to base, then?"

She's not touching the robot thing with a ten-foot pole.

So, that broom Sirius was holding?

He's suddenly straddling it, floating a good ten feet above their heads, with Lily shoved protectively behind him and his wand trained on Tomas.

"You're a Black. One of the cousins? Did Mum send you to drag me back? Because I'm not going. I don't fancy being tortured by my parents for not sharing their stupid prejudices."

Lily, as one might imagine, looks very surprised.

Wands being pointed = Bad, which is why the Emrys Fian belt is abruptly around his waist and he has the tablet - a palm-sized rectangle of metal - in his hand.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Whoa! Cool it, flying kid! He's not related to you!"

She's crouching slightly, ready to take to the air if it becomes necessary, but not breaking out the wings just yet.

"Excuse me if I have trouble believing..."

"Sirius." Lily's voice is calm, even as she eyes the tablet nervously. "They're not wizards."

"How can you be sure, Evans?"

"If they were would they have talked to us? How subtle is your mother, usually?"

".....well....."

"About as subtle as a hippogriff in a ballgown, yes?"

".....I do wish you wouldn't put images like that in my head, Evans, but yes, I see your point."

Sirius pauses thoughtfully for a second, then lands the broom and dismounts, slowly.

In the next eyeblink, he's been replaced.

By a big-ass dog.

This is likely somewhat surprising, all things considered.

Tomas pauses, staring at the Siriusdog.

Then looks at Ensorra for explanation. Then Lily. Then back at Sirius.

Ensorra facepalms with a metallic clink.

"Okay, you can turn into a dog. That's... useful. I guess."

"Sirius Orion Black, how long have you been a bloody Animagus?"

Lily's voice is not quite a screech, but it's close.

Sirius changes back, wincing. "Not so loud, Evans. A year," he says, and then turns to Tomas and Sara. "Right, you don't smell of lies. Sorry about that. There's a war on where we're from and most of my relatives are on the opposite side from me and Evans, here. Pays to be paranoid and all."

"Great. Well, I'm sure if we need a canine lie detector or if we come across any little girls in desperate need of cuddles, you'll be very useful."

"Play nice or go armoured again, Tomas. Kids, trust me, we know about paranoia. Don't worry about it. Now is somebody going to start walking homeward, or-- aw, fuck."

The source of that sudden conversational course shift would be the large green mass shuffling into view from a side street a few blocks away. A group of about fifty triffids, all told, heading for the four humans with stingers at the ready.

At least the fuckers are slow.

The fuckers -are- slow, and that's very useful.

It gives Sirius and Lily time to jump back on the broom.

Sirius is using both hands to steer, so it's Lily who casts the spell that creates a lasso of fire, which leaps from her wand to encircle the triffids.

PWNED.

Tomas just raises an eyebrow, folding his arms and watching.

...ditto that from the Morrigan corner.

The plants can't -scream- exactly, but that rustling is probably not indicative of joy.

Between Lily and Sirius, they have nowhere to run.

Oh, yeah. The kids can be useful.

She may be applauding now.

That was kind of awesome.

When the plants are gone - it doesn't take long - Sirius steers the broom back down toward Tomas and Sara.

"Magic. It's useful," he explains. "Now, this base of yours?"

He and Lily will just float along on the broom.

"In the subway. You might have to get off your cleaning tool slash flying vehicle slash phallic symbol to get there, though."

Snort.

"You're one to talk about phallic symbols, with the giant purple sword 'n all."

Ensorra's weapons are frankly too feminine-looking to be phallic. It's the sleek curves. And the sharp pointy fringes.

Lily giggles madly as they land.

Sirius doesn't, but at least he's not too sulky about it. "Lead the way, then," he says, bowing to Ensorra in a very gentile manner.

Lily eyerolls.

Ensorra flips him the finger and heads for base without another word.

She's grinning wryly behind her mask.

Sirius follows, looking more amused than upset.

Spend some time around Lily, you get used to being abused by women.

Lily hangs back and grins at Tomas. "Taking any bets on how long before she hurts him?"

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